To All Staff:
If you have reached this point in your life and you are unable to operate a simple piece of office equipment like a toilet paper holder, namely taking an empty roll off and putting a full roll on, please report to your supervisor immediately so you can be fired for incompetence.
If you are not incompetent and you had some other reason for just setting a new roll of toilet paper on top of the empty roll, please report to your supervisor so you can be fired for being a lazy sack.*
*Feeling that you are somehow above changing the toilet paper roll is also grounds for a good firing … see your supervisor.
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